The week I turned 30, I cut both my middle fingers so badly that each required a trip to the ER. And stitches. Seriously? Double sling and all, I rued that week long after the swelling, itchy stitches were removed from both hands. This was a message to me, I was convinced, but what did it mean?
Now that I'm four years beyond that experience, looking back I think I get it. Yup. The Universe was trying to tell me to slow down. Smell the roses. Figure out where I'm going. I didn't listen.
It's hard to listen. So, the big U sent me more messages. A layoff, asthma, and a chronically sore back.
"Stop! Think about what you're doing!" it pleaded as the seeming set-backs piled on. But no. I carried on. It's a curse really. I have the gift of imagination and forethought and can work toward a goal, nearly "tasting" victory as I toil right from the start. There's no time to stop and smell the roses when there are places to go, things to do. I have been known to spend hours at my desk, "holding it" until I find the best possible stopping point that will allow me a bathroom break. Yeah, stopping has never been something I've considered.
Until now. I have smelled the roses. I have been thinking. This Friday, I am taking a vacation day just for me to spend time writing. It's me. It's what I want to do. Stop, reflect, think, write. I'd love to someday teach college kids about literature and writing, be a published author, and hold my phD. I know there's a lot of work between here and there.
Here's to the journey! As my mother reminded me, Julia Child was in her 50s when she started the trip toward learning that would make her famous. Her first step was experimenting and learning to wield her tools. So although both middle fingers are slightly scarred, I respectfully pick up my pen and and let the journey begin toward achieving my true goals.
